This is What You Might Call...

IRONY. When in second grade, my father offered to pay me $5 to read a poem, like Urkel, namely "Prayer of the Selfish Child" by Shel Silverstein. I, the sick child I was, raised by wolves, with a cave-room placed hazardously in the path of fumes from a busy road, one might argue, agreed. Hell, I felt strangely forced by this weird man with strange notions to impinge on those around him, or children reliant on him, in ways such as this. Otherwise, his feelings might have been hurt (and, if I was afraid of this, it proved prophetic, because now he's always explaining where I have to watch out so I don't hurt his feelings). So, I accepted the $5, and, most likely, was severely socio-psychologically traumatized ad infinitum from this. Technically, this is psychological abuse, or, in other words, cruel, or stupid parenting. AND GET THIS: That BASTARD never handed me a 5er and said thanks for doing that for me, this is for that, or anything of the sort!!!! You've got to be going to hell when you treat your child like that! The guy, on Christmas of 2009, told me he was the AntiChrist to boot which, he later explained, before the stupid, insolent, and absolutely tactless individuals who he then utilized to attack me legally, being a lawyer himself, was a joke. Well, only the Anti-Christ, or a person who would give to their child, who had asked for a fish, a serpent, would make that kind of joke, or, alternatively, a pompous hick!